Movie Review: Sharknado

I first heard of Sharknado through a post on Weird Al Yankovic's Twitter and I said to myself "I have to see this movie." After re-tweeting Al's post, a friend of mine commented that this movie combines two things she is scared of: sharks and tornados. But isn't that the new trend in B-movies these days? Combining two things and making something "scary" out of it. It started with battles: the trailer for MegaShark vs. Giant Octopus was a huge hit on YouTube , this led to many more gigantic monster battles, not unlike what we saw in the golden age of Toho's Godzilla vs. Monster XYZ. However, when that well ran dry we started combining animals. Sharktopus (half shark, half octopus, all killer) was a ratings hit for the SyFy network and then came the storm seen 'round the world: SHARKNADO! Sharktopus may have been a freak of nature, but Sharknado is a FORCE of nature.

Our story (like we need one), revolves around a hurricane off the coast of Los Angeles that has picked up a bunch of angry sharks somehow and is dropping them all over the city, where they proceed to eat people and cause all sorts of mayhem. Fin (a retired champion surfer turned bar owner; played by 90210's Ian Ziering) is trying to get to his estranged wife, April (Tara Reid) and his two children, Claudia and Matt and make sure they are safe. Tagging along with Fin are a waitress named Nova (who has a scar that oddly looks like a shark bite, hmmmm...), Australian stereotype Baz and local drunk named George (John Heard, who seems to be in everything I watch these days). There are thrills, kills and gills, as Fin and crew try to make it to safety. There also seems to be no emergency services available anywhere, as Fin has to save everyone they come into contact with. Who needs cops and firemen when you got Steve Sanders! It all comes down to man vs. wild as the group has to save themselves and in the process, save LA. I just wonder where the hell the army was?

What's great about Sharknado is that there seems to be an attempt to be serious at times. I love B-movies that actually try to be good. When the filmmaker is in on the joke it takes away from the audiences fun of  laughing at the movie. I have no doubt that the creators of Sharknado knew how this was going to be taken, but they were smarter about it than many of their contemporaries who want people to know they know this movie is bad to appear smart (does that make any sense?).  I thought that some of the tricks used to hide the bad CG effects were effective, like focusing on the actor's faces during the big running scenes as opposed to wide shots and incorporating some stock footage of real sharks and floods added some realism. The giant ferris wheel coming off it's hinges and rolling down the street crushing buildings actually looked really good considering the budget. The CG sharks looked decent at times unlike in other "shark attack" movies that have come along lately and there is plenty of blood considering this is a TV movie. Ian Ziering is the clearly the star here and can do no wrong as our hero. He saves a school bus full of children and a retirement home full of elderly people from the impending doom that is Sharknado. He has the coolest lines, all the women want him and he has the best shark kills of all (you NEED to see the finale that features Ian with a chainsaw in a great white's gut!) The other positive of Sharknado is that they never really try to explain how it happened. Usually there is some sort of government experiment gone wrong or an alien force; but Sharknado sort of just happens. Which I guess if we want to get realistic about things, is how this would come about.

On the flip side, there is some really bad acting from Tara Reid. I know she was cute in American Pie, but damn she was bad in this; it was to the point where I couldn't stand it and was tempted to fast forward through any scene she was in. What happened? I used to like her. There was some inconsistencies with the backdrops: one minute it was dark and stormy, then it would be light. There would be a Sharknado in one corner of the city, but the other would be fine. Also, I know realism isn't what we should be looking for here but I really doubt that sharks can be killed with one bullet from a hand gun (I don't care how good a shot Steve Sanders is, that just ain't right) and I hope nobody watches this and thinks the way to stop a tornado is to toss bombs into it. Of course, these were homemade bombs because no one could find the army.

Sharknado will never be on anyone's list of greatest films ever made (unless you've only seen one movie and it is Sharknado) but I'm sure it will go down as one of the most memorable B-movies ever made. It was a big hit and had people who would likely never watch a movie of it's kind talking about it. Why is that? People love a good bad movie title. Remember Snakes on a Plane? If that was called anything else no one would've cared. Sharknado is best viewed with buds, suds (in my case soda suds) and grub. You'll get a few laughs, some wicked shark related kills and bad one liners that you'll be repeating for days. But I warn you, stay away from NYC in 2014, Sharknado 2 is in the forecast. FIN.

Best Scene: Ian Ziering rocking a chainsaw through a great white

Worst Scene: Tara Reid

Score: 7/10

Viewed on: Space Channel